Cocktails for Two

Tom Lehrer v. Mark Russell

Wed, 23 Dec 2009 17:16:41 -0800

We have been informed by Danforth France that The Simpsons episode “Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington” was making fun of Mark Russell, not Tom Lehrer.

Thank you, Danforth.

Episode 6 - Happy Winter Gift-Giving Eggnog, Quiverfulls v....

Tue, 22 Dec 2009 20:27:21 -0800

Episode 6 - Happy Winter Gift-Giving

Eggnog, Quiverfulls v. Amish, favorite spices, Diana calls NASA, and Katai does her best not to tell awful stories about her ex-stepmother.

Ep. 5.5 - The Leftovers From Episode Five Diana and Katai...

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 17:04:00 -0800

Ep. 5.5 - The Leftovers From Episode Five

Diana and Katai consistently complain about the drink that they can’t remember the name of, discuss the finer points of raping a dude, speculate about the possible existence of Glenn Beck’s dignity, and deliver their Halloween episode over a month late.

The quote Katai was trying to remember

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 10:24:00 -0700

“First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the woman.” - from Scarface.

Thanks to Clay Larsen and Jeremy Belanger for figuring this one out!

Ep. 5 - The Gross, Lazy Episode Diana and Katai drink the worst...

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 19:09:40 -0700

Ep. 5 - The Gross, Lazy Episode

Diana and Katai drink the worst drink yet, get sleepy, don’t know how to be girls, come up with a quiz to figure out whether you’re a Diana or a Katai, and just generally phone this one in.

Kanye Interrupts 2006 Nobel Physics Awards

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 14:30:00 -0700

Kanye Interrupts 2006 Nobel Physics Awards:

Oh, SNAP! Diana was telling the truth.

(Big thank you to Zach Reino for finding this.)

Episode 4 - I’mma Let You Finish, George Smoot Highballs,...

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 00:04:44 -0700

Episode 4 - I’mma Let You Finish, George Smoot

Highballs, Summer of Death, the cult of personality, and Kanye West defends Diana’s dad. No, really. Sort of.

(Note from Katai: I promise I will buy a pop filter for my heavy breathing. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Can I buy you a pony or something? I’m so sorry.)

Alex Berg: Preserver of Mysteries Alex Berg, friend of the...

Sat, 08 Aug 2009 16:43:00 -0700

Alex Berg: Preserver of Mysteries

Alex Berg, friend of the podcast, has some important shit to say about Final Fantasy on the night of his 27th birthday.

Special thanks to Clay Larsen and Drew DiFonzo Marks for preserving this historical moment.

Feel free to reblog this.

Get your very own “Cactus Time” T-Shirt:...

Tue, 07 Jul 2009 00:58:56 -0700

Get your very own “Cactus Time” T-Shirt: http://www.cafepress.com/totestotes.396806929

Thanks internet for making whims like this one a reality.

Episode 3 - A ValuTale Katai’s new job as a whale at Sea...

Thu, 02 Jul 2009 16:44:00 -0700

Episode 3 - A ValuTale

Katai’s new job as a whale at Sea World, LA sucks, Diana was way better than you in high school, and the House says “Cactus Time!”

Note: Katai keeps breathing into the mic because she had an asthma attack that morning and was receiving treatment in a free clinic up until the recording. Consequently, she’s still struggling to breathe normally. So if you get twitchy about that, you’re a jerk.

Episode 2 - Broke As a Jew, Drunk As a Skunk Mojitos, heat wave,...

Mon, 27 Apr 2009 05:00:00 -0700

Episode 2 - Broke As a Jew, Drunk As a Skunk

Mojitos, heat wave, gettin’ hit on, Diana’s bake-off with a dead woman, and Diana and Katai get so drunk that they ruin the podcast.

As a bonus, here’s the awful, awful Minnie Mouse TV special Katai mentions in the podcast:

Totally Minnie

(Edit: Diana and I are both dead wrong about the plots of LA Confidential and Chinatown.)

Jesus. That iTunes link is really fucking big, isn’t it? Too fucking big, if you ask me.

Thu, 16 Apr 2009 02:07:22 -0700

Jesus. That iTunes link is really fucking big, isn’t it? Too fucking big, if you ask me.

Find us in iTunes!

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 19:30:36 -0700

Find us in iTunes!

Our podcast “album cover.” Much thanks to Danforth...

Tue, 14 Apr 2009 23:24:15 -0700

Our podcast “album cover.”

Much thanks to Danforth France for putting it together.

Episode 1 - Hockey Playing Goose Pearl Harbor Revisited,...

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 16:09:00 -0700

Episode 1 - Hockey Playing Goose

Pearl Harbor Revisited, defending the Constitution, Troop Beverly Hills, a reason to like Katy Perry, and what happens when Diana and Katai realize they’re actually the same person.

(Side note: the sound is terrible, but actual mics are on their way. We promise. Until then, we recommend turning the sound waaaaaaay up. Also, we hope to do less giggling.)